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Two and a Half Men returned to CBS last night with astronomical ratings.



Ashton Kutcher's first appearance on the sitcom was seen by 27.8m and a huge 10.3 demographic score.

Two and a Half Men's ninth season premiere pulled in around double the average achieved by Charlie Sheen's episodes in season eight.

Sheen, who was fired in March, previously predicted that the show would not survive without him at the helm.

Two and a Half Men's huge audience offered a strong platform for new comedy 2 Broke Girls, which launched with 19.2m and 7.0 in the demos.

Dancing with the Stars led ABC to a total viewer victory, with 18.6m (3.9) between 8pm and 10pm for its 13th season opener, slightly down on last year's premiere audience.

Meanwhile, The Sing-Off's launch was far more underwhelming, with just 5.2m (1.9) tuning in to NBC over the same time period as Dancing with the Stars.

Over on Fox, the season finale of Hell's Kitchen took 5.9m (2.6), while catchups of H8R and Ringer mustered 1.2m (0.4) and 1m (0.5) for The CW.

Leading the 10pm hour, Castle returned to the Alphabet Network with 13.6m (3.3), while Hawaii 5-0 grabbed 12m (3.4) for the Tiffany Network, and The Playboy Club began with just 5m (1.6) for the Peacock Network.