Many years ago I had an important hospital appointment at Walsgrave. I left it a little late to book a taxi. Anyway I called one the biggest taxi firms in Coventry which I won't name to save them any embarrassment. What sounded like a young girl answered. She may have been a school leaver or just very inexperienced.
I asked: "Is there any chance of getting a taxi to the hospital for four o'clock this afternoon?"
Her exact words were (and I'm not making any of this up):
"You've got more chance of a f..." (before suddenly correcting herself) "...err, very little chance indeed".
I'll give her full marks for honesty if nothing else. Actually, from the way she sounded on the phone, the first option didn't seem like such a bad idea!
