After a short time, the gates creaked open and St. Peter appeared and looked out. Poor old St. Peter couldn't believe what he was seeing and after looking the pansy boy up and down he said "What do you want?"
"Well, I've just finished down below" said the pansy boy, " and I was rather hoping I could come in with you".
"We don't have your sort in here" said St. Peter. "Old Nick's waiting for you downstairs with his imps and toasting forks mate. Go on - clear off!"
"Oh, please let me in" said the pansy boy. "I really don't want to go down there".
"What have you ever done to warrant coming in here?" said St. Peter.
The pansy boy stood with his hand on his hip for a while then said, "Well, I gave twenty pounds to a children's' charity once - and I gave twenty pounds to an animal charity - and I gave twenty pounds to the lifeboats........"
"Oh I see", said St. Peter. "Well, the boss is in at the moment. I tell you what. I'll have a word with Him and see what He says. You stay here and I'll put a good word in".
After a few minutes the Pearly Gates creak open and St. Peter reappears.
"Well, did you speak Him? What did He say?" said the pansy boy.
"Er...., yes, I did see Him" said St. Peter holding something out in his hand.
"Look...er....
Spoiler:
off!"
