The 'Lady of the House' was very upset about being confronted and asked for a pay raise by the maid her husband recently hired.
'Now Martha, why do you expect me to give you a wage increase - what have you done to deserve it?'
Martha calmly replied: 'Well Madam, there are three reasons why I deserve an increase. First, I iron better than you.'
The Lady quickly replied: 'Who said you iron better than me?'
Martha answered: 'The Master said so.'
Madam: 'Oh, and the second reason is.?'
Martha added: 'The second reason is that I am a better cook than you.'
Madam retorted: 'Nonsense, who said you were a better cook than me?'
Again Martha replied: 'The Master said so.'
Madam answered dryly: 'Oh,' as she quickly grasped the situation.
Then Martha brought out the Big Gun: 'My third reason is that I am a better lover than you.'
Madam (now very upset and having drawn the obvious conclusion) tried to beat her to the punch and snapped back: 'Did the Master tell you THAT too?'
Without batting an eye, Martha politely replied: 'No Madam, the gardener did.'
SHE GOT THE PAY RISE