Condom factory burns
Posted: Tue Aug 31, 2010 2:04 amCondom factory burns down in ENGLAND
The Right Honourable Andrew Lansley, MP, MINISTER FOR HEALTH is awoken at 4am by the telephone.
Junior Minister: 'Sorry to bother you at this hour but there is an emergency! I've just received word that the Durex factory in Liverpool has burned to the ground. It is estimated that the entire English supply of condoms will be gone by the end of the week.'
Andrew Lansley: 'Shit ! The economy will never be able to cope with all those unwanted babies.... We'll be ruined.'
Junior Minister: 'We're going to have to ship some in from France.'
Andrew Lansley: 'Bad idea! The frogs will have a field day on this one.'
Junior Minister: 'What about Scotland?'
Andrew Lansley: 'I'll call Alex Salmond myself and tell him we need five million condoms, ten inches long and three inches thick.
That way they'll continue to respect the English.'
Three days later a delighted Andrew Lansley runs out to get the boxes that arrived at the Post Office. Opening the boxes he finds five million condoms all 10 inches long, 3 inches thick, all coloured blue and white to honour St. Andrews and with small writing on each one...they read...
The Right Honourable Andrew Lansley, MP, MINISTER FOR HEALTH is awoken at 4am by the telephone.
Junior Minister: 'Sorry to bother you at this hour but there is an emergency! I've just received word that the Durex factory in Liverpool has burned to the ground. It is estimated that the entire English supply of condoms will be gone by the end of the week.'
Andrew Lansley: 'Shit ! The economy will never be able to cope with all those unwanted babies.... We'll be ruined.'
Junior Minister: 'We're going to have to ship some in from France.'
Andrew Lansley: 'Bad idea! The frogs will have a field day on this one.'
Junior Minister: 'What about Scotland?'
Andrew Lansley: 'I'll call Alex Salmond myself and tell him we need five million condoms, ten inches long and three inches thick.
That way they'll continue to respect the English.'
Three days later a delighted Andrew Lansley runs out to get the boxes that arrived at the Post Office. Opening the boxes he finds five million condoms all 10 inches long, 3 inches thick, all coloured blue and white to honour St. Andrews and with small writing on each one...they read...
Spoiler: