I answered the door and said, "Not again, you came last bl**dy Christmas. Here's a fiver, now s*d off, and shut the gate on your way out." Slamming the front door behind me.
My wife shouted, "stop being horrible to the carol singers, they're only raising money for charity."
I said, "It wasn't them,
Spoiler:
it was your bl**dy Mother."
Of course it'll fit; you just need a bigger hammer.