Talk to me...

As I lay back on the couch, Dave sat down in his chair and said, "So,... What are your thoughts?"

I said, "Well... I've had gay feelings ever since I started at school. I fancied the other boys, but didn't want to be an outcast, so I had girlfriends to hide my sexuality. I found it hard to suppress my true feelings however, and this led to me becoming distant from everyone else, becoming a loner. This has continued into my adult life, and leaves me very, very depressed. Do you think this stems from the close relationship I had with my father?"

He said,

Spoiler:

"Look, mate, I'm just a salesman for DFS. Do you want to buy the sofa or not?"