After a while, he finds himself in a very nice neighbourhood with big, stately residences. No pubs, no stores, no restaurants, and worst of all no public toilets.
However, he really has to go, after all those beers He finds a narrow side street, with high walls surrounding the adjacent buildings and decides to use the wall to solve his problem.
As he is unzipping, he is tapped on the shoulder by a London copper, who says, "Sir, you simply cannot do that here, you know."
"I'm very sorry, officer," replies the American, "but I really have to go, and I just can't find a public toilet."
"Ah, yes," said the copper, "just follow me". He leads the American to a back delivery alley to a gate, which he opens.
"In there," points the copper, "whiz away sir, anywhere you like."
The American enters and finds himself in the most beautiful garden he has ever seen. Manicured grass lawns, statuary, fountains, sculptured hedges, and huge beds of gorgeous flowers, all in perfect bloom.
Since he has the policeman's blessing, he relieves himself and feels much more comfortable. As he goes back through the gate, he says to the copper "That was really decent of you. Is that what you call English hospitality that I've heard so much about?"
"No sir...", replied the copper,
Spoiler:
