Blondes...

(nothing in this section is to be taken seriously)

Re: Blondes...

Postby rebbonk » Thu Aug 25, 2011 4:32 am

A blonde asked someone what time it was, and they told her it was 4:45. The blonde, with a puzzled look on her face replied,


"You know, it's the weirdest thing, I have been asking that question all day, and each time I get a different answer."
Of course it'll fit; you just need a bigger hammer.
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Re: Blondes...

Postby rebbonk » Mon Oct 17, 2011 4:53 am

I went in to the vets yesterday with my dog and said to the blonde woman behind the counter, "Have you got a cure for fleas?"

"That depends," she replied,
Spoiler:
"what's wrong with them?"
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Re: Blondes...

Postby rebbonk » Thu Oct 20, 2011 6:32 am

A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were.

The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex.

Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?"

"HELLLOOOOOOO......," answered the blonde.
Spoiler:
"They're watch dogs!"
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Re: Blondes...

Postby rebbonk » Sun Nov 06, 2011 8:40 am

Earlier today I saw a blonde grabbing at the air above her head.

Spoiler:
She was collecting her thoughts.
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Re: Blondes...

Postby rebbonk » Sat Nov 19, 2011 7:10 am

A blonde made several attempts to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems finding a buyer, because the car had 340,000 miles on it. She discussed her problem with one of her friends.

Her friend suggested, "There may be a way of selling that car, but it's not going to be legal."

"That doesn't matter at all," replied the blonde. "All that matters it that I am able to sell this car."

"Right," replied her friend, "here is the address of a friend of mine. He owns a car repair shop around here. Tell him I sent you, and he will turn the counter back on your car to 40,000 miles. Then it shouldn't be a problem to sell your car."

The following weekend, the blonde took a trip to the mechanic on her friend's advice.

About one month after that, her friend saw the blonde and asked, "Did you sell your car?"

"No," replied the blonde. "Why should I?
Spoiler:
It only has 40,000 miles on it."
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Re: Blondes...

Postby rebbonk » Sat Dec 03, 2011 7:49 am

My blonde girlfriend came up to me earlier and asked, "Can I ask you a very serious question? But you must answer clearly with yes, or no".

Hesitantly, I replied, "Ok, go on".

Immediately, she asked,
Spoiler:
"Why are you always making jokes about blondes?"
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Re: Blondes...

Postby rebbonk » Sun Dec 04, 2011 5:53 am

Read the Sentence Below
Read the Sentence Above


This should keep a blonde preoccupied for a few hours
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Re: Blondes...

Postby rebbonk » Sat Dec 17, 2011 6:29 am

What do you call three blondes standing with their heads together?
Spoiler:
A wind tunnel!
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Re: Blondes...

Postby rebbonk » Tue Dec 27, 2011 7:51 am

Three women are about to be executed.

One's a brunette,one's a redhead and one's a blonde.

The guard brings the brunette forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests.

She says no and the executioner shouts, "Ready! Aim!''

Suddenly the brunette yells, ''EARTHQUAKE!!!''

Everyone is startled and throws themselves on the ground while she escapes.

The guard brings the redhead forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests.

She say no and the executioner shouts, ''Ready! Aim!''

Suddenly the redhead yells, ''TORNADO!!!''

Everyone is startled and looks around for cover while she escapes.

By now the blonde has it all figured out.

The guard brings her forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests.

She says no and the executioner shouts, "Ready! Aim!'' and the blonde yells,

Spoiler:
'FIRE!!!''
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Re: Blondes...

Postby rebbonk » Wed Jan 04, 2012 6:39 am

I walked into the pub last night and said to the blonde barmaid, "What shorts have you got?"

She thought for a moment, then said, "Red, green,
Spoiler:
and a really sexy pair of denim ones."
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