Returns

Walking into the shop and placing the bag on the counter, I said to the cashier, "I'd like to return this, please."

"Is there anything wrong with the item?" she asked.

"No, nothing," I replied. "It's hardly been used and I just no longer need it."

"Sir, this bag is empty," the cashier exclaimed.

"That's right," I said.

Spoiler:

"I'd like my five pence."