Smoking

My two kids keep coughing so I took them to see the doctor today. "Do you smoke cigarettes in the house?" the doctor asked me. "Yes." I replied. "About 20 a day."

"That's terrible!" He said, shaking his head. "Your habit is probably affecting your children more than it's affecting you. My advice to you would be to give them up."

"Fair enough, doc." I said, shaking his hand,

Spoiler:

"I'll call social services in the morning!