Golfing Nun

A nun is sitting with her Mother Superior chatting. "I used some horrible language this week and feel absolutely terrible about it."

"When did you use this awful language?" asks the elder.

"Well, I was golfing and hit an incredible drive that looked like it was going to go over 280 yards, but it struck a phone line that was hanging over the fairway and fell straight down to the ground after going only about 100 yards.

"Is that when you swore?"

"No, Mother," says the nun. "After that, a squirrel ran out of the bushes and grabbed my ball in its mouth and began to run away."

"Is THAT when you swore?" asked the Mother Superior again.

"Well, no." says the nun. "You see, as the squirrel was running, an eagle came down out of the sky, grabbed the squirrel in his talons and began to fly away!"

"Is THAT when you swore?" asked the amazed elder nun.

"No, not yet. As the eagle carried the squirrel away in its claws, it flew near the green and the squirrel dropped my ball."

"Did you swear THEN?" asked Mother Superior, becoming impatient.

"No, because the ball fell on a big rock, bounced over the sand trap, rolled onto the green, and stopped about six inches from the hole."

The two nuns were silent for a moment.

Then Mother Superior sighed and said,

Spoiler:

"You missed the putt, didn't you?"

Reminds me of the Dave Allen classic:

There was a nun called Sister Josephine who was always swearing. Eveything was this and that. One day the other nuns got together and decided that the very next time Sister Josephine swore they'd all get up and leave the room.

At dinner the next day Sister Josephine casually remarked "I see the fleeet's in?"

That was it, all the other nuns got up from dinner and left the room.

Sister Josephine shouted after them:

Spoiler:

"There's no need to rush, they're here for a week!"