I were in t' pub in Barnsley last Satdy neet, when this really unbelievably ugly woman come up t' me, squeezed me bum and said, "Give us tha number, sexy."
I replied "Has tha got a pen?"
She smiled and said "Yes."
I replied,
Spoiler:
"Well tha'd better get back to it, afore t'farmer notices tha's missin."