I'll be back

An old man and woman were married for many years, even though they hated each other. When they had a confrontation, screaming and yelling could be heard deep into the night.

The old man would shout, “When I die, I will dig my way up and out of the grave and come back and haunt you for the rest of your life!”

Neighbours feared him. They believed he practised black magic, because of the many strange occurrences that took place in their neighbourhood.

To everyone’s relief, he died of a heart attack when he was 68.

His wife had a closed casket at the wake. After the burial, she went straight to the local bar and began to party, as if there was no tomorrow.

Her neighbours, concerned for her safety, asked, “Aren’t you afraid that he may indeed be able to dig his way up and out of the grave and come back to haunt you for the rest of your life?”

The wife put down her drink and said,

Spoiler:

“Let him dig. I had the buried upside down…”

Spoiler:

This bit isn't a joke. At one time if someone committed suicide in Coventry they were buried upside down on the traffic island at the five ways crossroads in Harnall Lane. A stake was also driven through their body to prevent their soul from rising from the grave. For many years afterwards there were stories of phantom coaches being heard driven through the crossroads.