Resumé Bloopers - Gizza job

[rebbonk]

* "Here are my qualifications for you to overlook."

* "Wholly responsible for two (2) failed financial institutions."

* "Instrumental in ruining an entire Midwest chain operation." (Perhaps he meant running.)

* "Note: Please don't misconstrue my 14 jobs as job-hopping. I have never quit a job."

* "Finished eighth in my class of ten."

* "Experienced supervisor, defective with both rookies and seasoned professionals."

* "Please call me after 5:30. I am self-employed and my employer does not know I am looking for another job."

* "It's best for employers that I not work with people."

* "I’m extremely loyal to my present firm, so please don’t let them know of my immediate availability."

* "I Planned a new corporate facility at $3 million over budget."

* Personal Interests: "Donating blood. 14 gallons so far."

* "Education: College, August 1880-May 1984."